The Afterword

Tag: mental-health

  • AntennaPod

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    Peter
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    What app eats up most of your screen time — and do you even feel bad about it? I recently checked the Digital Wellbeing section in my phone settings. AntennaPod consistently comes out on top, anywhere up to an hour per day. I do not feel bad about it at all. AntennaPod is the app…

  • Too Busy Enlarging Our Lives to Live Them

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    Peter
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    If you could erase one trend from history, what would it be? If I could erase one trend from history, it might be the belief that bigger is always better. Bigger houses. Bigger cars. Bigger companies. Bigger cities. Bigger economies. Bigger audiences. Bigger ambitions. We have learned to treat growth as proof of health and…

  • Writing That Fills Me

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    Peter
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    What’s one habit that has improved your life the most? When I first started writing as a hobby many years ago, I set aside one morning each week. It was a discipline, and for a while it worked. Eventually, though, it was crowded out. I stopped writing for myself during the years when I was…

  • Being Needed and Being Whole

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    Peter
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    What’s a chapter of your life you’d title “The Hard Years”— and what got you through it? People often say that a person’s forties can be the hardest years of their life. That was true for me. I would call that chapter The Hard Years. Not because everything collapsed, but because I came face to…

  • Before The Problem Starts Shouting

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    Peter
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    What’s a lesson you’ve learned recently that shifted your perspective? Problems often speak before they shout. That is something I have been learning recently. Looking back, there have been situations where the signs were there early in the piece. They were not dramatic. They were not disasters. No alarms were ringing. But there were small…

  • More or Less

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    Peter
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    What do you love now, that you hated when you were younger? When I was younger, more seemed better. I loved to read, and building a library was something I valued. Book by book, shelf by shelf, I watched the collection grow. There was satisfaction in it. A growing library felt like a sign of…

  • Keep It Simple

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    Peter
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    What’s the best advice you’d give to someone younger than you? The best advice I would give to someone younger than me is this: keep things simple. That may sound too plain to be useful, but a lot of wisdom is plain. We often make life harder than it needs to be. We overthink, rehearse,…

  • Recognising the Thread

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    Peter
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    What is something you wish you could tell your 20-year-old self? At 20, I thought life was a linear progression. You chose your path, dedicated yourself to it, and then walked it. The challenge was to make the right decision early, commit to it, and stay faithful. At 20, I knew what my passions were.…

  • The Cost of Being Always Available

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    Peter
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    Write your guide to setting healthy boundaries in relationships. I am not sure I am qualified to write a guide to healthy boundaries, except as someone who learned them too slowly. For 20 years I was a parish minister. That meant working in a caring profession. People had real needs. Crises happened. There were weddings,…

  • Soulmates

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    Peter
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    Do you believe in soulmates? Why or why not? A soulmate and a best friend are not the same. A best friend is someone you trust, enjoy, rely on, and choose to share life with. A soulmate is someone who reaches something deeper in you: someone whose presence feels like recognition, not just companionship. A…

  • Lunch in Lo Lo Chai

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    Peter
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    Do you believe in minimalism? At lunchtime in Lo Lo Chai, the village had gone quiet. Doors were half open. The heat sat in the laneways. People were resting. Not because the life is easy. It is not. People here work hard. They are industrious. The day begins early. Work fills the morning, pauses for…

  • Listening to Fear

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    Peter
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    How do you handle fear and self-doubt? I have faced plenty of self-doubt over the years, mainly in the form of imposter syndrome. When I started my doctorate, I had a nagging sense that I would be found out. I felt as though they had let me in by mistake. Not a clerical error, but…

  • To Be Honest

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    Peter
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    What is a word or phrase that annoys you? There comes a time in every conversation when someone takes a deep breath, lowers their voice slightly, looks you in the eye, and says the three words that should make every sensible person reach for cover. “To be honest…” At which point I always want to…

  • It’s a Gift to Exist

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    Peter
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    What is a simple pleasure in life that brings you joy? I have not always understood this, but walking is one of the great simple pleasures of life. Not walking for fitness, though that matters. Not walking to get somewhere, though that helps. Just walking. I often follow the same route. The dog beside me.…

  • Curiosity Needs a Container

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    Peter
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    How do you stay motivated when learning something new? Learning is central to life. We learn from the day we are born. Children learn because the world is interesting, not because they have long-term plans. Children do not learn to walk because they are motivated by productivity goals. They fall, laugh, cry, get up, and…

  • Training for Freedom

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    Peter
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    How can you build a regular fitness routine? Fitness matters to me, although I can always do better than I am currently doing. The one thing I do without fail is walk. Every day. Even when it is bitterly cold. Even when it is wet. Even when I do not especially feel like it. I…

  • The Wealth of Less

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    Peter
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    What are the biggest benefits of minimalist living? My father started each day with a cup of tea. The cup was huge. Not quite a mixing bowl, but close. On it were the words: I’m not greedy, but I want enough. I never knew the story behind that cup, but I understood the joke. It…

  • The Library I Cannot Carry

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    Peter
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    If you had to describe your ideal life what would it look like? I was still in my teens when my grandmother looked at my bookshelves and declared that she had never seen so many books. At the time, I took this as a compliment. Or at least confirmation that I was becoming the sort…

  • The Glasses

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    Peter
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    What super power do you wish you had and why? Me:So this is the superpower? Super-Me:Yes. Me:A pair of glasses? Super-Me:You were expecting a cape? Me:At least something more dramatic.Flight. Strength. Deliverance. Super-Me:No.Just sight. Me:I already wear glasses. Super-Me:Not like these. Me:What do they do? Super-Me:They let you seewhat people are carrying. Me:Their thoughts? Super-Me:No.That…

  • The Compass, Not the App

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    Peter
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    What gives you direction in life? I used to think direction meant knowing where I was going. Now I think it means knowing what I must keep facing. In the old days, we followed a map. We unfolded it across the steering wheel, argued about the best route, and tried to imagine the landscape before…